Diesel engines have a lot going for them - Always have. They are especially good for constant RPM uses where multi-speed transmissions aren't needed, like boats and trains, heavy farm machinery and especially generating electricity. There are still many places where much of the electricity is generated using efficient single low speed diesel engines - Hawaii is one
For transportation a diesel still makes some sense for heavy long haul trucks, but even for them the new rules are making diesels more problematic and we're going to be seeing more and more battery powered trucks in the near future - Even for long haul trucks. Emissions systems and regulations are making diesels less practical. For smaller vehicles, IMO, time and emissions have pretty much passed them by. You'll be buying yesterday's technology if you buy a 2019 van with a small diesel in it. For an around town grocery getter, a BEV or a hybrid makes much more sense . . . . and she won't get that smelly diesel on her going to church clothes
The days of cheap diesel fuel behind us too - It will never be as cheap as gasoline again here in the USA, and as more regulations are put on it, the cost will only go up. Justifying a diesel because it's cheaper to run than a gas or especially a hybrid vehicle is gone too. Even a new Chevy Volt gets 40+ mpg running on gas alone and if you compare the total cost, using both gas and electric, it's much cheaper to run than any diesel
If she liked her mini-van, she would love a small hybrid van which can do many of her trips not burning any fuel at all. You can forget about transmissions because electric vehicles with their high torque motors don't need to shift gears . . . . one less expensive part to fix or replace
I can understand coming from an old diesel rabbit and then a newer TDI why you think you want to stay a 'diesel guy' for as long as you can, but I think your past positive experiences are probably coloring your judgement going forward. Times have changed . Is she really (be honest now) a 'diesel gal' too . . . . or would she rather drive something more practical?
Don